Today is January 1. It is believed that whatever you do and whatever your mindset is today will (almost) be a constant of what you will be for the entire year. I have colds from all thefireworks’ fumes and the crisp chill from last night. If this is any indication of how my health would be for2012, I choose to not believe that old wives’ tale. #waismode
But if my writing of a new post is an indicator ofhow masipag and conscientious I would be then 2012 is going to be so much better.
In retrospect, I think my entire 2011 could be summed up in one word: spring-cleaning. To be so literal about it, my annulment proceedings started and ended fast. Hearings, travels back andforth, constant texts from my lawyer friend, C, and newly-found friend in J, the clerk of court, waiting and lots of praying kept me on my toes. In between these, I had work --- a Project to be completed, a proposal for extension, all these project management stuff (reports, fund releases, budgeting, monitoring, review meetings, etcetera etcetera). On top of these, I was envisioning a career shift, and to prep myself up, I took the CES exam, passed it and waited for the next phase. I applied for a senior staff position in PMS and didn’t hear from them at all. Then I was told to try applying for the Director position because it was vacated due to their Rationalization Plan so I submitted my resume.
I received a few subsequent calls to undergo the rigorous application process for 3rd level position (read: Director) ---written exam (standard aptitude test, 5-part Essay), focus group discussion replacing the Interview process (had to deliberate on and solve a management case study that needed to be defended during that FGD), whole day psych exam administered by Ateneo in Ateneo and then the long wait. I was asked to accomplish the Personal Data Sheet required for government employment but was told that the Board has yet to deliberate on my psych exams, conduct a background investigation then decide. From Christmas to today, I am waiting, and yes, now unemployed but have more than enough time (that I did not have so much of that year) with my family, my boys included.
I received a few subsequent calls to undergo the rigorous application process for 3rd level position (read: Director) ---written exam (standard aptitude test, 5-part Essay), focus group discussion replacing the Interview process (had to deliberate on and solve a management case study that needed to be defended during that FGD), whole day psych exam administered by Ateneo in Ateneo and then the long wait. I was asked to accomplish the Personal Data Sheet required for government employment but was told that the Board has yet to deliberate on my psych exams, conduct a background investigation then decide. From Christmas to today, I am waiting, and yes, now unemployed but have more than enough time (that I did not have so much of that year) with my family, my boys included.
I had more time to do chores, do some grocery and wet market shopping (more of hoarding!), clean our closets (didn’t realize all my clothes are not “corporate-ish” anymore *sigh*), perfect my mashed potatoes and chicken macaroni, enjoy our new iPad, meet up with friends. I spent my last pay for Christmas shopping. I am broke but I am happy. (Is this a song from somewhere?) This, I guess, is what “not being poor in spirit” means. #channelingCoehlo
Today is going to be the start of big-time anticipation therefore, not only for work but at the personal front. I have yet to receive my annulment documents so I could start processingmy legal (maiden) personality. I dread going to NSO, DFA, NBI and all those government offices that need to be notified on my “updated” status. #parangFBlang (I liked working in government but disliked bureaucratic, un-streamlined, laborious frontline services that are required from a citizenbut are nonetheless toxic and bordering on unnecessary.) But I tell myself that since I have nothing else worthwhile and time-consuming to do, I might as well do those things willingly and happily so.
I honestly do not know how I am going to survive not earning for the next 2 weeks. Since college graduation, I have earned my keep and not relied on anyone, my parents and (ex)partner included. I do not need much but I need money for my phone bill, my mani-pedi moments that I cannot miss (or else my dry skin would eventually take revenge and cause me unbearable shots of pain that even a good foot massage and cold compress cannot comfort), my cucumber and banana treats for my boys, my personal effects. I cannot, for the life of me, imagine relying on anyone for my toiletries, my cheesecake or iced Black Tea fix. Yes, I am one proud girl. But then again, beggars cannot be choosy, and I refuse to either be a beggar and be (annoyingly) arte choosy so I am open to accommodating generous hearts. #abusadamodeON
Seriously, I have survived so many trying times, especially when I turned 33 years ago and also last year. What is not earning for the next few days (or a month?)? I have a home, homecooked meals, my gadgets and Internet connection and a promise of a really fulfilling work (that could eventually be MY career, as I choose it to be.) I am also eyeing thisposition that will soon be vacated (as told by a friend), and now I haveoptions. #Godisgood
And if this takes off, I will have that option of just literally walking to work and going home for lunch breaks.
For the meantime, I will keep myself busy --- being a bum, a couch potato and a junkie (of all sinfully good things: chocolates, potato chips, java chip lite frap). I hope I do not tire easily because it would pose another mind-boggling problem for me: what is beyond lazy?
No comments:
Post a Comment